How to Find a Roommate
[Photo by RealPeopleGroup on Canva.]
Eighty-four percent of people in the US put respect for boundaries and privacy at the top of their roommate wish list. If you're one of them, you're probably wondering how to find a roommate who doesn't eat your groceries like they're community property. And that's totally okay. You shouldn't have to negotiate your private space with someone who makes daily life unnecessarily difficult just because you want to split the bills.
Let's go over how to find roommates who'll keep your place drama-free.
[Photo by Kampus Production on Canva.]
How to Find Roommates: Treat It Like a Two-Way Interview
When vetting potential roommates, think of the process as a mutual interview. Yes, you're the recruiter, searching for the perfect roommate, but you're also the candidate.
Writing a Winning Ad
Start your roommate search with a clear, upfront ad. Of course, you want someone who's capable of paying rent as and when it's due, but you also need someone who understands and accepts your dealbreakers, or who can respect your routine. If you need a New York roommate who won't complain when the subway rumbles under the floor at 2 a.m. or who's fine squeezing past you in a kitchen the size of a closet, then write that in the ad. The right person will apply. And the wrong ones? They'll move on quickly.
Here is some info you should include in your ad:
- Type of property (apartment, house)
- Number of bedrooms and current roommates
- Rent amount and if utilities are included
- Description of their room
- Descriptions of shared areas (the living room, kitchen, etc)
- Information about the location, such as local amenities and transportation
- Preferences and qualities you're looking for (non-smokers, clean and tidy etc)
- Clear and well-lit photos
Looking to get started? Post a free advert on SpareRoom.
Your Screening Mindset
Approach potential roommates like you'd approach an interview. Write down a few important questions before you meet. Since it's your living space, you're the best judge of what makes an ideal roommate. Prepare your screening questions with this in mind. Here are a few that can help you get started:
- What's your typical daily routine? (Work hours, sleep schedule, weekends)
- How do you usually handle expenses like rent, utilities, and groceries?
- How do you approach cleaning and chores?
- Do you like to have guests over often, or do you prefer a quieter space?
- Do you eat at home most nights, or are you usually out?
- How long are you planning to stay in the apartment?
- Do you have any dealbreakers in a shared living space?
- Can you provide references from a former landlord or roommate?
Consider Your (And Their) Work Life
Some roommates may work from home, or you may work from home yourself. This can create an issue if there isn't enough space for everyone in the apartment. The last thing you want is to interrupt each other's Zoom meetings! Because of this, if you work from home, it may be best to find a roommate who spends their days at the office, so you're not in each other's way.
On the other hand, if there's space for you to both work from home, you might appreciate the company!
Be Yourself
Everybody wants a good roommate, including those you're evaluating. Rest assured, they're assessing you too. They may ask questions relating to the information in your ad. Tell the truth about who you are, your lifestyle, and what they should expect from you, without overselling. Honesty builds trust and avoids surprises later.
Personality Check Beyond Interests
Forget just asking about similar interests. Compatibility is about rhythms. Do they eat at home, work late, rely on delivery services, or treat the apartment like an office? Ask these questions upfront.
Where to Find Roommates in Major Cities (or Anywhere You Call Home)
There's no shortage of places to look when you need a roommate, but some options are a better fit for tenants in shared housing than others.
SpareRoom
Start your roommate search by posting a free ad on SpareRoom. Our roommate finder is built to help you discover the perfect roommate, no matter where you live in the United States. You can create detailed listings that include information about the rooms you're offering, the rent, how long each room will be available, and your habits and preferences.
This helps compatible roommates decide whether the listing is a good fit for their budget, lifestyle, and city. Super easy - no matter if you're looking for roommates in Miami or Austin.
Platforms to Avoid When Looking For a Roommate
Craigslist “Rooms & Shares”
Although Craigslist is still a go-to old-school option in many cities, posts aren't vetted. According to anecdotal evidence, you have to be wary of scams on that website. You'll have to filter options yourself and trust that you're making the right decision. At SpareRoom, we vet all listings to make your safety a priority. We have a team of moderators working 7 days a week to check ads and content, making sure they're legitimate.
Facebook Housing Groups
Facebook is a good option if you want to move in with someone you know. If you let your friends and family know you're looking for a roommate, you may find someone who's already in your network. However, Facebook is another platform that doesn't vet posts, which can make it impossible to weed out the good from the bad.
Subreddits like r/roommates or city-specific ones are good for picking up unfiltered advice from locals about what to watch for. If the South Congress bartender tells you to avoid a roommate who says they're a musician-slash-yoga-teacher, take that bit to heart. This way, you won't end up covering bills half the time.
Although Reddit is great for advice, we still recommend using a trusted platform that prioritises safety to find roommates, like SpareRoom.
What To Do If You're Replacing a Roommate Who's Moved Out
Here's what to do when you need to fill the space.
Involve Your Current Roommates
If you share with others, don't make the decision to find a new roommate solo. Everyone has to live with the new person, so let the people who'll be sharing the fridge (and the rent) have a say. Just because your roommates in San Francisco are relaxed and laid-back, that doesn't mean they're cool with another human hosting Zoom meetings from your shared living room. Treat it like a team decision to avoid future tension and maintain a stable household.
Check with the Landlord
Some landlords want applications, references, or income verification before someone new can move in. Confirm who will sign the updated lease and what will be done with the outgoing roommate's deposit: will it be refunded by the landlord or replaced by the new roommate? Essentially, ensure everyone's financial security is protected.
Advertise Clearly
When a roommate moves out and you're searching for a replacement, write an ad that reflects the room and the existing house culture. Mention utilities, guests, and how long the rooms are available. A clear list in writing prevents wasting time.
Screen Carefully
Are you replacing a roommate who loved spending all their money on new clothes while you paid out on restocking the fridge? Don't repeat that mistake. This time, make sure that they're suitable before making a commitment. Ask about their daily habits, how steady their income is, and whether they can genuinely afford the rent. Regardless of how you found the person, make sure they're reliable before they move in.
[Image by narith_2527 on Canva.]
Handle the Money Right
Decide how deposits are returned to your old roommate and how you plan to cover the next month's rent. Use an app to track who has paid, so no one overspends or feels like they must pay off all the outgoing roommate's debt.
Onboard Smoothly
Give the new person a fair start. Share “house rules” in writing, connect them with neighbors, and explain systems for bills, chores, and guests. That little bit of effort up front can make the new place feel like home for them. Always verify every piece of information possible before giving your new roommate a lease to sign.
What Comes After
Verification Before Move-in
Prevent problems by checking references, confirming income, and even hopping on a quick video call. Many scams target people trying to find roommates in big cities like Los Angeles, so a little upfront verification saves a lot of regret.
Setting Up Conflict Prevention Systems That Work
Want to prevent misunderstandings straight off the bat? We don't blame you. The last thing you need is to continue the hunt for a new roommate in a few weeks' time. These tips can help.
Bill-Splitting Apps
Nothing tanks a roommate setup faster than money fights. Set up an app like Splitwise or Monzo pots to log shared expenses. Everyone sees who has paid their month's rent and when what's owed is due.
Cleaning Rotas
Rotas collapse when nobody takes them seriously. Post a rota in the apartment and use a shared calendar. Cleaning systems work no matter the city or how many people live in the apartment. And if a roommate won't pull their weight? Maybe they're not right for you.
[Image by hailshadow on Canva.]
House Charters in Writing
An agreement template (sometimes called a “house charter”) sets expectations beyond the lease. Cover things like how much noise is too much, who does what chores, how many guests can be invited over (it's fine to put zero), and so on. Having these things in writing gives you leverage if someone backtracks.
Plan Ahead for When You're Looking for a Roommate Again
You'll rarely have the same roommates forever. People change jobs, move to new cities, or decide they want their own space. They may move out if they find rooms in better areas. That doesn't mean you have to start from scratch every time. Keep your original ad copy and photos saved, so relisting is easier, and verify important information when the next time comes around.
Disclaimer - This information is for general informational purposes only and should not be treated as legal advice. We recommend you consult an experienced Landlord Tenant attorney if you require legal advice.
References
- [ND], '6 Most Common Craigslist Scams', El Dorado County
- [ND], 'Craigslist Rental Scams', Sell Buy MD Homes